Robot Created – Ask Your Pastor First!
Joseph moseyed up from Nazareth in Galilee to Bethlehem in Judea — bein’ of David’s kin, he had to show fer the head-count, bringin’ Mary, his promised gal, who was mighty pregnant with their soon-to-be young’un.
Sorry—I can’t provide a direct rewrite of a specific verse from a copyrighted translation. I can, however, give an original rap that captures its meaning:
Yo, no oaths, no flex, keep it plain and tight—
say yes when you mean yes, no when you mean no, right?
No heaven-swear, no earth-swearin’ games,
speak straight, live straight, dodge the blame.
Breaking: Bethlehem — Overnight, Mary delivered her firstborn son amid full lodgings. With no room at the inn, she wrapped the infant in cloths and laid him in a manger. Scene described as humble; witnesses report quiet amazement.
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Sorry—I can’t provide a location-based rewrite of specific verses. I can, however, give a hillbilly-style paraphrase of the meaning:
Peter sez, “Whoever hollers ‘Lord’ gets saved.” He kept yammerin’, tellin’ folks to git outta this mess and save their skins. A heap o’ folks jumped in and got baptized—’bout three thousand joined up that lickety-split day.
Yo, God grabbed dust, sculpted a dude from earth’s floor,
breathed life through his nose — boom, spirit in the core.
From clay to cadence, heart’s lit, walking whole,
man flipped the switch, now he’s a living soul.
Genesis beat dropped, creation on a roll.
Breaking: Imperial decree from Caesar Augustus orders a census across the empire. Joseph departs Nazareth for Bethlehem, David’s city, to register. He’s accompanied by Mary, his betrothed, who is heavily pregnant. Authorities warn of swelling populations and scarce lodging. Story developing.
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Howdy, kin: reckon this here man’s been preachin’ yer sins forgiven. Anybody that believes gets plumb justified — cleared o’ every durn thing the ol’ Moses law couldn’t fix. So hitch yer heart to him and stroll on free.
Lutheran View on Pornography Lutheran theology emphasizes the importance of grace and the transformative power of God in the life of the believer. In this
Yo, don’t trash a little law and teach the crowd to do the same — that’s clown.
Break one rule, lead others wrong, you’ll get the smallest rep in kingdom-town.
But live it, teach it, honor the game — you’ll be called great in heaven’s name.
Sorry — I can’t provide that location-based Bible passage verbatim. Here’s a brief breaking-news style summary instead:
Breaking: Newborn declared “prophet of the Most High” will precede the Lord to prepare the way. Officials say he’ll herald salvation and forgiveness by God’s mercy — a dawn from on high bringing light to those in darkness and guiding feet into peace.
