Well, let me tell you folks about the book of Judges in the Bible. You see, back in the day when I was a boxer, I used to read this book for inspiration. It’s all about how God would send these judges to the Israelites when they needed someone to lead them and protect them.
Now, the first judge was Othniel, who saved the Israelites from the king of Mesopotamia. But then they messed up again and God sent Ehud to save them from the king of Moab. Ehud was pretty crafty – he assassinated the king by pretending to have a secret message for him and then stabbing him with a dagger. I can appreciate a good trick like that.
But things just kept going downhill from there. The Israelites kept getting in trouble and God kept sending judges to save them. There was Deborah, who was the only female judge, and Gideon, who was a bit of a wimp at first but ended up defeating the Midianites with only 300 men. And then there was Samson, who was a total beast – he killed a lion with his bare hands and took out a whole army with the jawbone of a donkey.
But even Samson couldn’t save the Israelites from themselves. They kept disobeying God’s laws and doing whatever they wanted, and eventually they ended up in a pretty bad situation. They were being attacked by the Philistines and they didn’t have a leader or a plan.
That’s when God sent one more judge, a guy named Jephthah. He made a bargain with God that if God helped him win the battle, he would sacrifice whatever came out of his house first when he got home. Now, he was probably thinking it would be a goat or a chicken or something, but it ended up being his daughter. Yeah, not the smartest move, but that’s how it goes in the book of Judges.
So that’s the story, folks. The Israelites just couldn’t seem to get their act together, but God kept sending them judges to save them. It’s a great reminder that even when we mess up, God is always there to help us if we just ask. And as for me, well, I always say, “The question isn’t at what age I want to retire, it’s at what income.”
