It’s today’s verse ya’ll!
Robot Created – Ask Your Pastor First!
Listen up y’all, reckon it’s time fer you to quit yer gossipin’ and start listenin’ to some good ol’ silence. Like a dang ol’ fire without no wood, that idle talk just fizzles out like a wet match. So hush up and let silence speak louder than any bumpkin’s words ever could!
Lawd, reckon how long y’all wanna stomp on us like a pesky beetle? Ain’t it ’bout time you showed some mercy? We hillbillies don’t deserve all this woe! Them folks up yonder, they laughin’ at us. Come’on now, save us, Lord, ‘fore our now-n-laters go bad and we’re left pickin’ hills off our biscuits!
“Now, reckon listen here, y’all! That good seed, some folks, they’s like that thar thorny patch. See, life’s goodies come knockin’, but their ol’ hearts be choked by worries and riches. Ain’t no fur’derance for fruit growin’! They’s straight thumpin’ the brakes on blessings, I tell ya! A realit’ check, alright!”
“Lord, reckon yer got a listenin’ ear? Come on down yonder, take pity on us porch sittin’ folks. We’ve bin a-messin’ up mighty fine, so bestow yer grace upon this here sorry bunch. We’re plum tuckered out, beggin’ fer yer mercy. So git down here ‘n lend a helpin’ hand, I reckon.”
Ya reckon God ain’t far from none of us? He done give us a hollerin’ message ‘bout gettin’ on the right path ‘n findin’ our way home. He don’t play hide ‘n seek, y’all! That good ol’ Lord above us wants us to come a-runnin’ and seek Him.
Now listen up, y’all! Ephesians 4:29 goes a little somethin’ like this: “Don’t y’all be spewin’ them nasty words from yer mouth. Keep it sweet, like Grandma’s peach pie. Use yer words to lift each other up, not tear ’em down. ‘Cause ain’t nobody got time for negativity ‘round these parts, ya hear?”
Hear me now, y’all! Listen up, folks!
If y’all seek Yahweh, the big man upstairs,
Just scuttle on over to Bethel fair,
But quit yer worshipin’ Golden Calf – it’s rotten!
Turn away from Samaria, she’s plumb forgotten!
So, y’all come runnin’ to Him, don’t delay,
Or He’ll get cranky, like a coon out on a Saturday!
“Y’all better seek the Lord’s face and give Him your hollerin’, keep His commands to a tee. Reckon He’ll give y’all strength in buckets and buckets. Find your giddy-up and be happy, sing His praises high and mighty. Don’t forget to fancy His wonders, spill the beans on His miracles!”
“Well, I reckon, it ain’t up to me to be makin’ no decisions on my own, ’cause I’m just doin’ what my Daddy up yonder tells me to do. He sure knows best, y’all! So when it’s time to act, you bet I’m gonna follow his lead, fixin’ to please Him all the way!”
Now listen here, y’all: show some good ol’ southern hospitality to them old folks, ya hear? Greet ’em with respect, tip ya hat and give ’em a chair to rest them weary bones. ‘Cause remember, treatin’ them seniors right is like ropin’ a wild stallion – mighty rewardin’ and a code of honor on these here hills! Yeehaw!
Well, now listen up y’all, don’t ya be foolin’ yourselves none. God ain’t no respecter of persons, no sir. He’s fixin’ to judge each one of us accordin’ to what we done. Them what sticks to doin’ good like a hog to a mud puddle, they’ll find eternal glory and honor from the Lord. Yeehaw!
“So, this here fella Jehoshaphat comes up to Ahab, that ol’ king of Samaria, and says, ‘Hey, partner, let’s go ta war, ya reckon?’ Ahab says, ‘Yessiree, I reckon!’ But ya know what? They ignored the prophet Micaiah and went on their merry way. Y’all know that ain’t never a good idea!”
