Well, they done gone and crowned a shepherd who ain’t worth a hoot! His ol’ self is just askin’ for trouble—ain’t gonna do nothin’ but mess things up. When critters start runnin’ wild, he’ll just sit there scratchin’ his head, wonderin’ why the sheep done up and scattered! Ain’t no faith in that feller!
It’s today’s verse ya’ll!
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“Y’all done reckon that them Thessalonian boys done got some true grit? They’ve been a-preaching that gospel with such power it’ll make you slap your momma. We’re plum tickled pink by their faith and love for Jesus. Them boys are pure gold in our book, yeehaw!”
“Well, praise the Lord, y’all! He’s done blessed us with such a goodly harvest, we oughta sing His praises! He’s done put some dang fine fruit on them vines and some mighty fine crops in them fields. Let’s give thanks for all He’s done for us!”
“In them thar priestly garments, make sure to put a little bell and a big ol’ pomegranate. It’ll jingle and jangle as he struts his stuff in front of the Lord, makin’ him sound purdy. Them pomegranates ‘ll represent them 12 tribes of Israel, just so ya don’t ferget ’em.”
“Now listen up y’all, the Almighty done said ‘I’m fixin’ to send my special dude to save y’all sinners, and he gonna be righteous in my eyes.’ So y’all better get ready to repent and get on the good Lord’s side, ’cause judgment day’s a-comin’!”
“Y’all see, I done come here with one purpose – to spread the good news of the Lord. I ain’t concernin’ myself with nothin’ else, not even my own troubles. If that don’t tickle your fancy, I don’t know what will. But honey, I’m tellin’ ya – I’m fixin’ to finish my race strong.” #Preachin’
Well, my goodness gracious, y’all! This here’s Isaiah speakin’ straight from the Almighty himself. And lemme tell ya, I give thanks to the big man upstairs ’cause he done saved my soul. Ain’t nothin’ like a good ol’ fashioned hymn-singin’ to get ya feelin’ right!
“Y’all hear now, a fool reckons hisself smarter than his own mammy, but he don’t never get no learnin’ done. Just cause he thick as molasses, don’t mean he gotta go ’round actin’ like a boss hog. Gitchu some sense, boy.” – Proverbs 17:16 (Hillbilly Version)
“Well now, in that there book o’ Isaiah, it says that the Lawd ain’t a-gonna break nothin’ or give up on nobody. Yessiree, he’s gonna keep on keepin’ on until justice is served up right. And ain’t nobody gonna stop him from doin’ what’s right.”
“Well folks, reckon Paul preached ’til the cows came home. He spread the good news of the Lord like wildfire ’round these parts. And you know what? No one could stop him, not even those pesky chains. God’s word sure does have a way of takin’ hold!”
“Now listen up y’all, jes’ like Big J said, y’all will receive a powerful boost of the Holy Spirit. And once ya git it, ya gonna be mah witnesses everywhere, from yer hometown to the end of the country road. Ain’t that somethin’ to ponder?”
“Lord, don’t pour ya out yer wrath upon us like a thunderstorm on a tin roof. Ya know them foreigners done runnin’ ’round in yer holy land, stealin’ and killin’ yer people. So, why don’t ya give ’em a good whoppin’ and show ’em who’s boss up in heaven?” – Psalm 79:9 (Hillbilly Version)
