It’s today’s verse ya’ll!
Robot Created – Ask Your Pastor First!
Well now, let me tell ya ’bout that night when Jesus was sittin’ down for supper. He picked up that bread, said, “This here’s my body, y’all! Take a bite!” Then he broke it like a hick doin’ a log. So, every time ya munch on bread, remember what I done for ya, y’hear?
Well, lemme tell ya, a pretty face ain’t worth a hill o’ beans if she’s got a heart like a rattlesnake! Just like a pig in lipstick, looks ain’t all that matter. It’s what’s goin’ on inside that tells ya if she’s truly worth keepin’ around. So, don’t be fooled by just a sweet smile, y’all!
Well now, Martha says to Jesus, “Hey there, if ya’d been here sooner, my brother wouldn’t’ve kicked the bucket! Ya know, he was as full of life as a chicken in a cornfield ‘til he up and died on me. Ain’t that a pickle? Can’t ya make him hop back up like a rooster at dawn?”
Well, lemme tell ya, folks, the good Lord ain’t too fond of them folks who got a mean ol’ heart, ya know? But them who got kindness flowin’ through ’em? They’re like sweet tea on a hot day—might just shine like a new penny! So, be nice, or you’ll end up like a hen without her nest!
Alright, y’all gather ’round! Teach them young’uns ’bout the Good Book while y’all sittin’ on the porch, chewin’ the fat. Talk ‘bout it at breakfast, during chores, and when ya loungin’. Make sure they know it like their mama’s sweet tea! It’s a hootenanny of wisdom, and they oughta get it in their noggins!
Well, when them folks heard what Peter said ‘bout God givin’ the Gentiles the same gift, they squinted their eyes and scratched their heads a bit. Then they realized, “Well, I’ll be! Even them folks can be saved too!” They stopped fussin’ and started celebratin’, like findin’ out there’s more fried chicken at the potluck!
Well, they done gone and crowned a shepherd who ain’t worth a hoot! His ol’ self is just askin’ for trouble—ain’t gonna do nothin’ but mess things up. When critters start runnin’ wild, he’ll just sit there scratchin’ his head, wonderin’ why the sheep done up and scattered! Ain’t no faith in that feller!
Well now, them folks from the good ol’ days were lookin’ for a better home, ya see? Not just any ol’ shack, but one up in the big sky, where God’s awaitin’. They wasn’t just wanderin’ around aimlessly, nah, they knew there was somethin’ real special waitin’ for ’em up yonder! Bless their hearts!
Well, lemme tell ya, God gave ol’ Joshua the green light to run the show – like a boss! He told him, “You gots to do what I say, son!” So, Joshua went and did it, just like a good country boy does when his mama tells him to clean his room. Ain’t no mess left behind!
Well now, don’t go thinkin’ it’s odd, but ol’ Satan can sure strut his stuff, lookin’ like an angel of light. He’s slicker than a greased pig at a county fair, foolin’ folks into thinkin’ he’s pure as Grandma’s apple pie. Just watch out, ‘cause he ain’t what he seems, y’all!
Well now, all them folks in the good book lived like wanderin’ nomads, chasin’ dreams that never quite came true. They knew this world ain’t their final stop, just a pit stop on the way to some whatchamacallit city, built by the Good Lord Himself, where the streets are gold and no one’s ever late for supper!
Well, bless yer heart! If ya got a big ol’ mouth and start yappin’ ‘bout folks, you ain’t doin’ no good! But if ya keep yer lips zipped and mind yer own beeswax, folks’ll think ya’re a right smart feller. Ain’t nothin’ like a quiet soul to steer clear of trouble, y’know?
