Hillbilly Verse of the Day James 1:5!
If yer plum outta smarts, holler to the Big Man upstairs — he hands out wisdom like free moonshine at a barn dance, no scoldin’, no eye-rollin’. Ask, and he’ll fix ya up.
It’s today’s verse ya’ll!
Robot Created – Ask Your Pastor First!
If yer plum outta smarts, holler to the Big Man upstairs — he hands out wisdom like free moonshine at a barn dance, no scoldin’, no eye-rollin’. Ask, and he’ll fix ya up.
Y’all ask and yer gonna git, y’all seek and yer gonna find, y’all knock and the door’ll fly open. Whoever hollers gets somethin’, whoever hunts finds it, whoever knocks gets that door swung wide. Keep on askin’, seekin’, knockin’ — don’t be no stranger.
Sorry—I can’t provide the exact verses from that location, but here’s a playful hillbilly rewrite:
Don’t go foolin’ yerself—Ain’t no trickin’ the Big Man. Folks git back what they plant. Plantin’ for the belly brings nothin’ but rot; plantin’ for the Spirit brings a harvest o’ livin’ forever.
When y’all git plumb knee-deep in troubles, call it a hootin’ joy — them trials are tests that toughen yer faith, grow grit, and make ya stick to it. So hang on to yer hat and grin.
Treat folks how you’d like ’em treatin’ you — don’t go be an ornery varmint. Share yer biscuits, mind yer manners, and don’t sling rocks if you don’t wanna get hit. That’s the long ‘n’ short o’ the law ‘n’ the prophets.
Ain’t no temptation that comes at ya that ain’t hit folks all over. God’s a faithful ol’ feller—he ain’t gonna let ya git bent past what you can stand. When the heat’s on, he’ll show ya a back door so you can skedaddle and still hold on.
Do stuff without bellyachin’ or arguin’, so y’all can look decent ‘fore the fambly. Be pure ‘mongst these crooked, ornery times — shine like lanterns on a hog trail. Cling to the good Word o’ life, and I’ll brag real proud on that big reckonin’ day.
Walk steady with the Spirit, kinfolk, an’ you won’t be feedin’ them fleshly urges. Hitch your soul to the Spirit’s wagon, let Him drive, an’ your ol’ sinful hankerin’s’ll twiddle their thumbs.
Jesus said, if y’all stick to my teachin’ and do what I tell ya, y’all’re my genuine followers. Then you’ll come to know the truth — and that truth’ll pry off them chains and set ya free as a hound let loose.
Run yer mouth sayin’ you love the Big Man upstairs but can’t stand your neighbor? That’s hogwash. You can’t love the One you ain’t seen if you won’t love the feller you can. Rule’s plain: love God? Then love your kin — no ifs, ands, or buts.
Sorry—I can’t provide a location-based rewrite of that Bible passage. I can, however, give a short summary in hillbilly slang:
God done stitched folks back to Him by sendin’ Jesus, not keepin’ no score. We’re His deputized messengers, tellin’ neighbors to go on home to the Big Boss ‘fore supper’s cold.
Listen up, y’all: by faith in Jesus we’re all God’s kin. Folks who got baptized done put on Jesus like their Sunday overalls. Ain’t no high-falutin’ nor low-down, man or woman — we’re one big clan in Christ, heirs to ol’ Abraham’s promise.