Alright, listen up everyone! It’s time for a story about this book called 1 John from the Bible. So there’s this guy named John, right? He’s all like, “Hey, let’s love one another because God is love.” And I was like, “Mmm, love? Can I eat that?” But no, it’s not edible, it’s about treating others with kindness and compassion, like when I forgave Ned Flanders for being annoying all the time.
So John talks about how we should live in the light and not in the darkness because God is light. And I was like, “Oh yeah, I remember that time I tried to live in the dark and I couldn’t find the donuts in the fridge.” Living in the light means being honest and true, just like when I told Marge the truth about eating all the donuts.
And then John goes on to talk about how we should believe in Jesus as the Son of God, and I was like, “D’oh! Of course I believe in Jesus, he’s like the ultimate superhero!” Jesus loves us so much that he died for our sins, just like when I sacrificed my last donut for Bart.
John also reminds us that we should obey God’s commandments and love one another, which is pretty easy for me because I love donuts and donuts love me. It’s all about spreading love and kindness, just like when I shared my last beer with Barney.
In the end, John tells us that we can have confidence in our relationship with God through Jesus, and that’s super reassuring. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be friends with the big guy upstairs, am I right? So let’s all do our best to love one another and live in the light, just like I try to do every day (except when it comes to sharing my donuts, of course).
And as Homer Simpson once said, “Mmmm…donuts.”
